Finding the joy I lost
- Mar 11
- 3 min read
MY BRITISH FAMILY
When Ciniaga first met Greg, he was in a dark place. Convinced his whole family had died in conflict, he was alone in the UK. But friendship with Greg and his wife Maggie was to turn his life around.
Ciniaga, an IT engineer who speaks four languages, fled his home in the Democratic Republic of Congo. The political situation was extremely unstable and he feared for his life. As he explains: “We did not have a choice over leaving our home, we were forced to flee.” In the chaos, he was split up from his wife and children, and thought they had died.
Distraught, Ciniaga sought asylum in the UK. Although he was accepted, like so many refugees separated from their families, he could not find peace:
"To an outsider, you may look free, but in your mind you’re in prison. If you could look into the heart of a refugee, you might see that the person isn’t there anymore – it’s as if they died a long time ago."
A special picnic
Then we stepped in and introduced Ciniaga to consultant Greg, a volunteer befriender. “Before our first meeting, I was really nervous,” admits Ciniaga. "At that time I was just thinking about my lost family 24 hours a day. I would see other families in the street and it would remind me that I was all alone. I barely felt human inside. I wondered if Greg would even be able to see me as a person."
Greg and Maggie treated Ciniaga to a home-made picnic in a local London park. "It was so nice!" he exclaims. He felt he had found people he could trust, and began to open up for the first time in years.
"It made such a big difference to tell them my story. Maggie hugged me really hard. So I started to believe there was another life for me beyond this crisis, and there my hope started. Greg brought back the joy that I lost years ago."
Welcome to the family
Greg sees himself as part mentor and part family friend, lending both emotional and practical support: “I helped him with his CV and his refugee status case. I told him, keep going, you’ll get there.”
Since that picnic, the friends have met often, but one occasion stands out for Ciniaga: “The most important for me, was the first time Greg asked me to his home, and all his family came. This has always remained in my heart.”
“The most positive thing has been helping somebody who has faced extreme challenges, and seeing him turn his life around.” GREG
Wonderful news
Once he got his refugee status and right to remain, a new possibility opened up for Ciniaga.
Against all the odds, he had clung to a scrap of hope about his family's survival and now he was able to apply to the Red Cross to find out what had really happened to them. One day he got the life-changing news that they were still alive.
Filled with joy, he rang Greg and Maggie rightaway.
“He was beside himself!” exclaims Greg. “He had gone through an enormously difficult six years and suddenly something he didn’t dare hope for turned out to be true.”
Although the whole family is not yet reunited, Ciniaga is smiling a lot more these days, says Greg.
As for Ciniaga, he can’t say enough about how Greg and Maggie have helped him.
“When you are surrounded by good people, then good things happen. I have been so lucky.”
This story comes from our latest Annual Report. Click here to read more.
